For Me…

It’s no secret. I juggle. Everyday.

And with the busiest time of the year upon us, I know that I will desperately cling to my sanity as I do every year.

Sometimes I have so many balls in the air, I know that I’m never ever going to be able to catch them all. It was difficult to balance before I started writing again, a few years ago. And with the writing, it sometimes feels impossible to make time.

Being a Wife, mother, working career woman, daughter, I’m often spread extremely thin. But the writing is for me because I need it to clear my mind, and to be a better person. I need it to relieve stress, to exorcise my demons, and to work through the tangled web of thoughts that get cluttered up in my head. Making time in the midst of hearing my name called hundreds of times a day, can be extremely challenging, but I try every day.

Stories have always been something that I have always loved and needed, almost as much as the air that I breathe. Reading a good book and allowing it to transport, inspire me, and fill me with it’s beauty has opened me up to worlds that I never knew existed. Writing about them has been a privilege and has given me more joy than I ever thought possible.

But I’m torn as most of us are, when it comes to meeting our own needs, and meeting the needs of others. A great many of us, when we get to choose, put the needs of others first. I truly think that there are times that we have to give ourselves permission to choose to do the things that make us whole and make us feel right. Whether it is writing, or going to a yoga class, or a concert, or sitting in a coffee shop alone for an hour with our thoughts, we should just allow ourselves the time. We have to realize that we don’t do it to neglect our responsibilities, or the people in our lives that mean the most to us, but we need to do it in order to make ourselves whole. The better that we are, the better we can be for those around us. If we are not whole, we truly can’t be the person that we are meant to be.

We don’t always look at our lives like this. But I know that its what I need, for me. The reality is, that sometimes we simply become frustrated by our own lack of personal time to do the things that we want to do.

I don’t question that I can do everything. I know that I can, slowly, steadily, and with great care. I know that my children won’t be little for long and that they won’t want my attention as much in a few years. I know that my life today will be very different from my life in ten years from now. So for day, I have to be realistic in my priorities. I have to suck up the frustration sometimes and write when I can, not always when I want to. I have to accept that the story is still within me, waiting to be told, but that it’s going to be told a little slower than I may want it to.

Setting realistic priorities, expectations, and goals, will help me to be the best possible Me that there is. Which is best for everyone! ❤

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