Tag Archive | A Little More About Me

“The Talk”

“They” say that you need to have “The Talk” with your children at around the age of ten these days!

Um… Eeeeeeek!

I’m pretty sure that I never had anyone give me “The Talk.” My “Talk” consisted of “Don’t do it. Until you’re married. Ever.” And that was is. What I learned about sex as an adolescent was anything that could be read in a Jackie Collins novel or learned in health class . It just wasn’t a topic that was talked about which seems to be the general consensus of most people around my age.

But as my oldest has reached that milestone of double digits, my husband and I are basically playing “rock, scissors, paper” to see who gets to have that conversation. I think he should have it because he’s the man and has the same “equipment” as my son, and he thinks I should have it because… let’s be honest, I’ll handle it better. Truthfully, neither of us want to have it and as two intelligent adults are being pretty squeamish about it. I’m not sure if it’s our own fear, awkwardness, or embarrassment or if it’s just that we want our son to remain young, sweet, and innocent forever. (I’m going with the first one)

We do know that the moment we walk through that door, there’s no turning back. Once he knows about where babies really come from, he’ll never see the world (or us) the same ever again. He may even be horrified at the mere thought of it, which would be quite fine with me.

What I really want to tell him that he’s entirely too young to think about anything other than baseball, Play Station, and sports, and then I don’t want to tell him anything else about it. I still want him to think that girls are “disgusting and stupid” and I want him to wrinkle his nose in disgust when we ask him if he likes any of the girls in school. Quite frankly, I’m not ready for him to grow up and  I don’t want to worry about those things yet.

I know that I don’t JUST want to talk to him about the sex part. I want to talk to him about love and that’s it not simply about touching a girl because he can. I want to tell him that his body is going to do weird stuff in the next couple of years, but “not to worry” and that it’s just part of growing up. Having “The Talk” means that sooner than later, I’ll have to worry about sexting, and porn, and inappropriate behavior. I’ll also have to worry about hormones, moodiness, and his sweet little voice getting deeper. I know  I’ll have to be diligent in identifying skanky little girls who want to move too fast, and be prepared to terrorize them when necessary, which I’ve been dreaming about ever since my boys were born (insert evil laugh here).

Even though it’s right around the corner I’m not ready for acne, and attitude, and being questioned about my level of intelligence by the child that I created in my own body. I’m just not ready and I’m so frustrated about it because ten years has just gone entirely too fast! It snuck up on me and I wasn’t expecting it to happen this soon.

Dang it!

I can’t consider having this conversation with him until I accept that he’s growing up, and have I already said that I’m just not ready? Does it sound like I’m throwing a temper tantrum? Because I am! I’m too emotionally attached and even though I still have another eight years to go until high school graduation. I’m so disturbed that we are well past the midway point with him and that the youngest son is following closely behind.

I feel as though by the time I truly get to know them and understand them, they’ll be off to college starting a whole new world, becoming something else entirely. Then the person I’ve been for the past ten years is going to be hopelessly lost and yes, I’m already lamenting about having Empty Nest Syndrome with nearly a decade left. But look at how rapidly this decade has flown by!

I know… I know… I’m making having “The Talk” all about me when it’s clearly not, or at least it shouldn’t be. It’s really about preparing my kiddo for the next phase in his life and it’s not his fault that his mom is a wimp.

What everything boils down to, is, that I’m just not ready to have “the talk” even though I’ve been giving myself pep talks for months. I thought I would be ready by the end of the summer and that I could do it before school starts, but school starts in two weeks and I haven’t worked up enough courage yet, but I’m working on it.

Being a parent means that you have to be brave… so I’m going to stop whining, pull up my big girl pants, and look for opportunities to start teaching my kiddos about the things that make me incredibly uncomfortable. Chances are, we’ll all be uncomfortable, but at least I’ll have done my job and hopefully my child will be benefit. He’s ten for goodness sake and just told us that he only weighs fifteen pounds when he’s sitting on the toilet, because little boys do silly things like that. He doesn’t take himself too seriously yet so neither will I. I’ll explain things to him like he’s ten and not twenty, and let him know that we’re here for questions and concerns. So hopefully when he starts morphing and his body becomes one big uncontrollable hormone, at least he’ll know that the lines of communication are open.

And by then, hopefully I’ll be over my tantrum and well over myself so I can be the adult parent that I’m supposed to be guiding my children and preparing them to understand themselves and make good decisions about their sexuality and their lives, no matter how freaked out it makes me.  For now I’ll just relax, and try to figure out how a ten year-old will understand  “the Birds & the Bees.”

I probably just need to have faith that I’ve done a pretty good job of explaining life to them this far and I’ll probably do this part just fine too. 😉

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Blog Challenge Day 15-Timeline of my day

Every day is a new day for me.  A different day. 

I don’t have a job with set hours, so I’m off during the week sometimes and sometimes I work really late. 

But here is a general timeline for my crazy life…

5:30 am-hit snooze and try not to piss off my husband.  My intent is to work out, but then I hit snooze or just set the alarm for 6:00 am.

6:00 am-hit snooze again, try to sleep for ten more minutes after I sleepily check every virtual method of communication possible (email, facebook, twitter, facebook author page, blog page etc).

6:10-Shower. 

6:30-7:30  Wake up the Hubby.  Wake up the kids.  Get everyone up, coffee made, dogs outside, breakfast made, everyone out the door.

7:40 Kids dropped off for the day

8:00 Heading to work. 

8:30 Talk to people, work all day, do all of my grown up job things. 

6:30-7 Home, Dinner, Clean up, hang out with the family, sometimes I get to write while I’m hanging out with them, or blog, or edit, or make notes. 

9:30 Kids go to bed (summertime), chill with the hubby

10:30-11:00 Write until my head hits the keyboard and wakes me up or I wake myself up because I have a huge crick  in my neck from falling asleep sitting up..

There are times that my day consists of actually getting to work out, cooking, cleaning, playing baseball, watching baseball, writing, reading, and if I’m really lucky~Grocery shopping 🙂 

Throughout the day, my brain is always moving and I feel like I’m always engaged in life, sometimes too engaged. Sometimes I have to just give life a rest and so I drive home in complete silence just to be able to detox from the craziness of my mind and of Life. It may seem like my days are pretty boring, but I love it, and I’m happy that I get to live my life.  There have been days days that it wasn’t quite so easy, so I am thankful that despite the craziness, it’s pretty low risk, but high reward.  ❤

 

 

Interview with Jennifer Sivec

I have <3ed meeting so many wonderful, talented, generous people on this journey I've been on since publishing *Eva*. Kristen has certainly been one of those people and I am so appreciative of how she supports her fellow Authors! Thanks Kristen ❤ ❤ ❤

Kristen Hope Mazzola

Please meet the wonderful and beautiful Jennifer Sivec! She shares some of her fantastic writing with us so please enjoy it and be sure to add her book to your TBR list!!! 😀

Do you write under any other names? No
What are you currently working on?  I am currently working on the part 2 to the “Eva Series”.  I recently released part 1 “Leaving Eva” in April. 
How many (if any) books do you have published and what are their titles?  I self published my first novel, “Leaving Eva” in April. 
Leaving Eva
What inspired you to write your first book?  I’ve been writing all of my life.  I’ve always dreamed of writing a book, but have never had the discipline to see it through to the end.  I finally just made the commitment that I was going to write a complete novel and then painstakingly saw it through…

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31 Day Blog Challenge-Day 2

Blog challengeI saw this Blog Challenge yesterday and toyed with doing it. It looks like a big commitment and some of the items are things that seem a little TMI for me to share. But the purpose of blogging for me, is to challenge myself to step outside of my comfort zone and to write more often and sharpen my skills. I figured this was a good way to do it so I am going to jump in.
To avoid being redundant, I’m starting with Day 2. I’m going to count my original post and picture for my blog as Day 1.
20 things about me:
1. I love to read (I know, obvious!).
2. I’ve only had two adult jobs in my life. The most recent one for almost 14 years.
3. My favorite author is John Steinbeck. I love his writing style and how he tells such a colorful story.
4. I’m a dog person.
5. I’m short.
6. Music is therapy for me, but I don’t often know artist’s names, even for songs that would seem obvious.
7. I didn’t know how to love deeply until I had my sons.
8. I love to sing loudly in my car like nobody is watching.
9. I don’t have a favorite color, but I don’t like the color peach.
10. I don’t have a favorite food. I like mostly everything.
11. I write to cleanse.
12. I think different accents are beautiful and I love listening to them.
13. I’ve only ever had three cars in my life.
14. I wish I was three inches taller.
15. I used to write poetry but haven’t written a poem in a long time.
16. I love country music because of the stories the songs tell.
17. I wish I was funnier.
18. This is a more difficult exercise that I thought it would be.
19. I’m working on my second book, but haven’t had as much time to work on it as I would like.
20. I appreciate anyone who has taken the time to read all 20 things about me. Now you know a little more about me 🙂