Tag Archive | living

Blog challenge Day 20-a Difficult Time in My Life

When I started this blog challenge, this was the blog day I was dreading.

Nobody wants to rehash difficult times…or dwell. We work hard to overcome them, move past them, and if possible- forget. I also knew that I needed to be able to share without sharing any of the gory details. I can write a mean scene in a book, but I have no desire to openly share the ugliest moments of my life.

I finally realized that every difficult time in my life involves loss….physical, figurative, perceived. But loss nonetheless. I lost two friends in car accidents in my 20s, my grandmother who I adored when she was in her 90s. I lost the parents who adopted me. The dad I knew as an adult was struck down with a debilitating stroke, and the mother I knew to encephalitis. Though they are still physically there, the people I knew are gone forever. I lost friendships. I lost relatives to death, and I lost my birth parents, or maybe they lost me. I almost lost my niece to cancer, but thank God she was spared. And I almost lost love, but love always seemed to come back for me.

I write a lot about Loss because I’m intimately in tune with it. And while I do as much as I can to move past it, it still haunts me. So I try to dwell on what I’ve found instead of what I’ve lost. If I only thought of what I had lost, I don’t think I could get up every day. I try to focus on my happiness and not my sadness. The difficult times are bound to find me, but I’ve been through them before. Loss will find me again, and I dread it, but I can’t hide from it or live in fear of it. So instead – I search for joy, laughter, and love, knowing that I can’t stop the rain.

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Busy Life

I started working out…again.

One of my Facebook friends Rick, asked me if I ever slept-between family, busy career, writing, and now working out. I juggle a lot, always have. We all do.

And it’s difficult. So many people say they wish there were more hours in the day. But if there were, we would just fill them up too. Time is precious and short, and all of those other cliches we hear. Rarely do I ever have any down time, even when I really I need it!!! But I still get a lot done somehow.

I’ve learned a lot about time management and goal setting in my grown up job. And even though I don’t have time for EVERYTHING, I feel that my full life is worthwhile. I feel like I am experiencing the moments as I’m supposed to…not just like I hope to.

I do a few small things…

1. Plan Ahead when possible
2. Set small goals
3. Set realistic goals
4. Let go of the things I don’t need
5. Live in the moment

I don’t claim to be an expert in the matter. I have plenty of days where I am frustrated with myself and feel as though I am lacking in more than one, if not all of the roles in my life. But I give myself permission to fail, and then I get up the next day and start all over. I’ve forgotten pajama day at school, missed deadlines, and gone weeks without writing one line. But I tell myself it’s okay.

My children are happy, my relationships continue to grow, and I contribute to the world the way that I was meant to. The small goals get accomplished, and before I know it, I’ve finished a novel and knocked something off my my bucket list!

At the end of the day, I am fulfilled. And I am thankful for the grind, the responsibility, and the Purpose that I have in my life. I wouldn’t change anything ❤